When the Lord was creating police officers, he was into his sixth day of overtime when an angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."
And the Lord said, "Have you read the specs on this order? A police officer has to be able to run five miles through alleys in the dark, scale walls, enter homes the health inspector wouldn't touch, and not wrinkle his uniform.
"He has to be able to sit in an undercover car all day on a stakeout, cover a homicide scene that night, canvass the neighborhood for witnesses, and testify in court the next day.
"He has to be in top physical condition at all times, running on black coffee and half-eaten meals. And he has to have six pairs of hands."
The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands... no way."
"It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the Lord, "it's the three pairs of eyes an officer has to have."
"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel.
The Lord nodded. One pair that sees through a bulge in a pocket before he asks, "May I see what's in there, sir?" (When he already knows and wishes he'd taken that accounting job.) "Another pair here in the side of his head for his partners' safety. And another pair of eyes here in front that can look reassuringly at a bleeding victim and say, 'You'll be all right ma'am, when he knows it isn't so."
"Lord," said the angel, touching his sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow."
"I can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can talk a 250 pound drunk into a patrol car without incident and feed a family of five on a civil service paycheck."
The angel circled the model of the police officer very slowly, "Can it think?" she asked.
"You bet," said the Lord. "It can tell you the elements of a hundred crimes; recite Miranda warnings in its sleep; detain, investigate, search, and arrest a gang member on the street in less time than it takes five learned judges to debate the legality of the stop... and still it keeps its sense of humor.
This officer also has phenomenal personal control. He can deal with crime scenes painted in hell, coax a confession from a child abuser, comfort a murder victim's family, and then read in the daily paper how law enforcement isn't sensitive to the rights of criminal suspects."
Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the police officer. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model."
"That's not a leak," said the lord, "it's a tear."
"What's the tear for?" asked the angel.
"It's for bottled-up emotions, for fallen comrades, for commitment to that funny piece of cloth called the American flag, for justice."
"You're a genius," said the angel.
The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there," he said.

Me, The Lousy Cop, anonymous

Well Mr. Citizen, I guess you have me figured out. I seem to fit neatly into the category you place me in. I'm stereotyped, characterized, classified, grouped, and ALWAYS typical. I'm the "lousy cop."
Unfortunately, the reverse is not true. I can never figure you out.
From birth you teach your children that I am a person to beware of...and then you are actually shocked when they identify me with my traditional enemy, the criminal.
You accuse me of coddling juveniles, until I catch your kid doing something wrong.
You may take an hour for lunch, and several coffee breaks each day, but point me out as a loafer if you see me having just one cup.
You pride yourself on your polished manners, but think nothing of interrupting my meals at noon with your troubles.
You raise hell about the guy who cuts you off in traffic, but let me catch you doing the same thing and I am picking on you.
You know all the traffic laws, but never got one single ticket you deserved.
You shout "Foul!" if you observe me driving fast enroute to an emergency call, but literally raise hell if I take more than ten seconds responding to YOUR call!
You call it "part of my job" if somebody strikes me, but it's "police brutality" if I strike back.
You wouldn't think of telling your dentist how to pull a badly decayed tooth, or your doctor how to take out your appendix, but you are ALWAYS willing to give me pointers on law enforcement.
You talk to me in a manner and use language that would assure a bloody nose from anyone else, but you expect me to stand there and take it without batting an eye.
You cry, "Something HAS to be done about all the crime!" but you can't be bothered with getting involved.
You've got no use for me at all, but, of course, it's OK if I change a tire for your wife, or deliver your baby in the back seat of my patrol car on the way to the hospital, or save your son's life with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, or work many hours overtime to find your lost daughter.
So, Dear Citizen, you stand there on your soapbox and rant and rave about the way I do my job, calling me every name in the book, but never stop a minute to think that your property, your family, or maybe your life might depend on on thing--ME, or one of my buddies.
Yes, ME, the lousy cop!

A Cop On The Take, anonymous

First he takes the oath
Now look at all he takes
He takes it in stride when people call him pig
He takes time to stop and talk to children
He takes your verbal abuse while giving you a ticket you really deserved
He takes on creeps you would be afraid to even look at
He takes time away from his family to keep you safe
He takes your injured child to the hospital
He takes the graveyard shift without complaint because it's his turn
He takes his life into his hands daily
He takes you home when your car breaks down
He takes time to explain why both your headlights have to work
He takes the job no one else wants- telling you a loved one has died
He takes criminals to jail
He takes in sights that would make you cry
Sometimes he cries too, but he takes it anyway because someone has to
If he is lucky, he takes retirement
He takes memories to bed each night that you couldn't bear for even one day
Sometimes, he takes a bullet
And yes, occasionally he may take a free cup of coffee
Then one day he pays for all he has taken, and God takes him

Please remember that the "He" in all this represents all police officers, both men and women that have served and are serving our cities and their citizens we have all swore to protect.

God bless ALL cops everywhere.